2.16.2009

Spring Eternal

Right now the everyday stuff is getting to me. I’m tired of taking care of kids, trying to think of things to cook, listening to my children cough and wiping their noses. I’ve had enough of kissing my husband goodbye as he goes to work, paying bills, and living within a budget. I’m even growing weary of putting on makeup, doing my hair and even getting dressed (especially when my clothes are not fitting as nicely as they used to).

This time of year is always hard for me. For me, it’s not the winter and all the storms and the gallons of water pouring out of the sky for days on end that get me down. It’s spring. It starts to get sunny and I start to feel guilty. I look outside and think of all the things I should be and could be doing and it overwhelms me. So I stay inside and twiddle the day away until it’s time for bed. Then I stay up all night thinking of everything I should be doing in this weather and hope that it starts to rain again soon. Last night was especially bad because I had looked at a book on gardening and the ideas would not stop bouncing around my head until 2 or 3 AM.

I wish there was something I could do to get out of these dull days but, like every year, I’ll just have to get though them. Soon it will be summer and I’ll be soaking up warm rays of sunshine and probably accomplishing most of what I’m feeling guilty about now. Thank God that our seasons change. I would turn into crazy person if it were eternally spring.

1 comment:

  1. No time for guilt, Holly! I just keep having to tell myself "No, you have to get a saw from your friends first, the you cut the branches, then you get cinder blocks, then you put them in, then you make garden boxes with 2x4's, then you can dig in the dirt, and THEN you can plant the potatoes, onions and garlic." And then I say, "Ok, self. I see your point. I should calculate how much wood and cinder blocks I need." And then this week I should do that.
    Smile! I can't wait for a good, hot day!

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