Let me start out by saying that I had a wonderful day today. We went to a birthday party this morning, then had a play date this afternoon and then we went to another friend's house for a shin dig we've been doing for the last couple weeks. You'd think, with all this social stimulation, I'd be a happy camper this evening. Alas, I think MY ORDER is out of order again.
Before I go on, I also have to add that we are having friends for dinner tomorrow night and my husband has been working for four nights in a row (12 hr shifts) right after our trip to Eastern Oregon.
I think I have a little too much going on right now and it's bringing up feelings of anxiety and with those feelings, out comes the MOMMY MONSTER. Thankfully, the girls have gone to bed, but not without a fight. So now, to help myself feel better, I'd like to list for you, all the reasons I am irritated tonight. I need to vent!
1. My house has too much stuff in it and most of it is on the floor right now.
2. I keep having the miracle of the multiplying laundry (instead of the loaves and fishes).
3. It's time to go through kids clothes for spring and I don't want to do it. I have bags and bags floating around of clothes that are too small to give away and clothes that I've saved to go through.
4. My daughters have eaten WAY too much candy and I feel guilty for letting them.
5. My daughters have watched WAY too much TV and I feel guilty for letting them.
6. I'm sick of cold, rainy weather. The trees even look as though they are heavy with tears.
7. I'm tired of having to have an elaborate plan just to get to town with a toddler who gets car sick.
8. My garden needs tending to and no one but me will do it I would rather clean the toilet than dig in the dirt.
9. My vacuum cleaner does not suck up dirt anymore and it's silly for me to just push dirt around so I haven't been vacuuming. Shhhh...don't tell our guests coming tomorrow.
10. How am I supposed to look good in a swimsuit this summer with my post-babies-mommy-tummy? I can't decide between a tankini or a full body suit. I hate them all.
11. I love books, but why do we have to have so many of them? I'd love to have some nice bookshelves to hold all of them instead of the mismatched and warping bookcases we have now.
12. I need a new pillow. Right now, my pillow feels like I'm sleeping on a piece of cardboard wrapped with an old t-shirt.
Really, there is a lot more going on in my head than just these things, but these are the tangible irritants. I just need to get my life back in the right order. Back to knowing that God is in control and that I don't need to have any anxiety at all.