9.13.2010

Just Another Sheep on a Cliff


Today was the first day for Baby Boy to have his rice cereal.  He's six months old now.  He hated it and gagged most of it up.  We all laughed as he made the most awful looking faces and his eyes looked at me pleadingly as if to say, "help!" 

I'm sad to be coming to the end of nursing exclusively.  Baby Boy (I'm going to have to come up with another nick name) will most likely be our last baby and it is bitter sweet to end this chapter in my life.  The last six months have been like climbing up a cliff.  One of my feet would slip just as I got a good foot hold with the other.  It has been exhausting and tenuous.  Now that he and I have finally gotten this nursing thing down, we are about to go into the food smashing, chopping, gagging, smearing and icky-sticky-dirty stage.  It's as if I have made it up this first cliff and am lying exhausted and panting only to come to the next cliff.

I guess that's how life is.  One cliff after another.  Once in a while I make it to a flat spot, get my breath back, have a few days of joy and then start up the next cliff.  With each twist and turn that life takes, I keep climbing up these cliffs and praying that I never fall.  The blessing is in looking below and seeing where I've been and how far I've come.  I am able to recognize that I am growing stronger and am learning.  I've learned there are some places that I should probably not put my foot due to loose rocks or roots I should not grab because they are dry and weak.

Even though I have done some of the work discerning each step, most of the work of discernment was passed on to me through the teaching of my parents.  My parents were also taught by their own parents but in their mid-thirties just before I was born, they became Catholic Christians and so passed on the long and careful discernment of the Church.  It is a voice I can trust.  It is the voice of Jesus himself.

"My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me;" (John 10:27)

Now it is my work, my vocation, to pass on this discerning voice, this moral code to my children.  They will have to climb their own cliffs, but hopefully they will be able to make good decisions and place their feet where they ought to go.

1 comment:

  1. Ah, I'm coming to that bridge with Ruby. She's 6 months now and I don't want to give her solids cause it's so much easier to just breastfeed her. I know it's a bridge I must cross and I'm coming to it hesitantly. I bought some rice cereal and some baby food, but haven't given her any. It's such an awesome connection, being able to soothe her buy simply feeding her. I don't want to lose it.
    Isn't it amazing how much easier cliffs are to climb with having God in your life? I find that it is, because I know with Him, I can do all things.

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